Chocolate and Ice

Black women; wonderfully unique.


Interview with Destinee Jones-Abstaining from sex till marriage is it worth it?

Posted by Lmarbly on February 17, 2016 at 2:15 PM Comments comments (0)

Interview with Destinee Jones-Johnson

By Christine Thomas




Abstaining from sex till marriage is it worth it?

Hello everyone,

It’s your girl Christine, of Christine’s Corner. I thought the topic of abstinence, or maintaining virginity till marriage would be a good topic for Valentine’s Day and beyond. Valentine’s Day is usually a day and night for unbridled passion and the promise of a romantic dinner, skimpy lingerie and good sex. Valentine’s Day has passed but it didn’t stop me from getting in touch with my good friend Destinee. She is the best person to talk to about abstaining till marriage and actually walked the walk. Not an easy one according to her. I’ve known her for years and I know she is an inspiration for some young women who want to know her experience for waiting and whether or not it is worth it?

CT-Hi Destinee, how are you girl? You’re looking great. I see Mister is keeping you happy.

DJ-I’m fine Christine. Thank you and yes he is.


CT-When I interviewed that fine husband of yours I thought he was very charming.

DJ-Thank you


CT-When we were in college you were the only one of us who never really had a boyfriend. And you weren’t having sex like the rest of us. College is usually the place where people experiment and I was no exception. I’m going to tell you. I thought you were weird and missing out. Please tell my readers, why maintaining your virginity was so important to you?


DJ-You thought I was weird? You never told me that before.


CT-I did. But I also admired your stand. Temptation is too great out here. It was too many fine brotha’s on campus. I don’t know how you did it.


DJ-Part of it was upbringing and religious convictions-I know that’s not politically correct. Once I got older and was able to make decisions for myself it was what I wanted to do. I always felt sex was something special that shouldn’t be given away to just anyone. No judgment. That was my choice for my life.


CT-I’m glad you mention no judgment because people usually feel some kind of way when they encounter a woman who chooses to abstain. Why do you think that is?


DJ-Just guessing, it could be because they wish they had waited. Perhaps the first man they gave themselves to; proved to not be worthy. Men view you as a novelty and like the thrill of the hunt and to see if they can persuade you. At the end of the day men and women view sex differently and women are often the ones who feel out of sorts if they didn’t get from a man what they expected after giving their bodies to them.


CT-What about women who enjoy sex and don’t put archaic limitations on themselves when it comes to sex?

DJ-Just like my choice to abstain was my own, women who don’t like archaic limitations have a right to live how they see fit. My choice to abstain only became a problem when certain people started questioning me about it and they felt some kind of way about my choice. You know who I’m talking about. I only talked about it when I was confronted about it.


CT-Did the questions about abstaining bother you back then?

DJ-Only when I was ridiculed for my choice; other than that, no.


CT-So that brings me to a very personal question. Your husband is the only man you’ve slept with. How can you know if he is good or not? Do you regret not playing the field a bit?


~~Destinee laughs here~~

DJ-Yes he is and I am very satisfied in more ways than one with his performance. No complaints on either side. I don’t regret not playing the field. You remember #####? She was very free and vocal about her conquests but when she met ######## she quickly forgot about the body count she used to not only brag about, but she used to rub it in my face that I wasn’t getting any. So I don’t see the point of playing the field, only to want to forget about your conquests once your knight and shining armor shows up.


CT-It’s safe to say your husband wasn’t a virgin, correct?

DJ-No he wasn’t


CT-Do you think your choice to remain one till marriage was his motivation for pursuing you?


DJ-I guess you’d have to ask him, but I don’t think so.


CT-I’d love to ask you some even more personal questions but I know you shared some in Two Become One. Two snaps girl, you didn’t hold back.


DJ-Well enquiring minds wanted to know some things


CT-My final question. At the end of the day; was waiting for sex worth it?

DJ-Yes. It was a long journey. I wanted to throw in the towel many times, but I’m glad I made the personal choice to wait.


CT-Thank you Destinee. I wish you and your husband the best and many more years to come.

Anything you’d like to share with my readers?


DJ-Just make sure when you are having sex it’s with someone who really loves you, respects you and because you want to. I preferred sex within marriage, but that was my choice. Thank you for inviting me.


By Lisa Marbly-Warir


Destinee romance novella (Book 1)

Two become one-A Destinee romance (Book 2)

Born Out of Lust (Book 3) -coming soon



Available at








They don't make romance novels for Plain Janes

Posted by Lmarbly on December 4, 2015 at 10:40 PM Comments comments (0)

“They don’t make romance novels for plain Jane’s, or women that look like me.” I was at work the other day and I asked one of my coworkers “Do you like to read?” She said yes-so I gave her a business card with my book information she sees that it’s a romance novel. She goes “OH! Well, um I don’t read romance books because the rich handsome hero always picks the model or the beautiful woman, but not someone that looks like me.” I was on my break and couldn’t stop and delve deeper into the conversation, but it got me to thinking how many other women feel this way?

Anyway, I don’t think she was wrong in her assertion, but I wanted to tell her well write your own book and make the heroine look the way you want, after all we all have a story in us, whether or not we write it is well………. another story. Reading and watching movies is about escapism anyway-I can’t speak for anyone else but most people like to see in movies or read about two attractive people coming together in love, especially if a sex scene is involved. But here is the problem, women are held to a different standard when it comes to looks. How many movies or sitcoms have we watched where the man was overweight, a nerd, considerably older or just plain ole not attractive but his woman is average to pretty and even beautiful? But it is rare to never the other way around. Of course we have to consider those shows/movies are probably written from a male perspective.

Bridget Jones diary, The truth about cats and dogs and even Jane Eyre are the only movies/story I can think of off the bat where the woman was a “plain Jane” and If I remember correctly the men weren’t exactly rich, handsome types so maybe it balances out in those cases. At the end of the day beauty is in the eye of the beholder; I get it, it’s been like this since the dawn of time, I’m not trying to ruffle feathers or change something that’s been a human condition since forever, men like beautiful women (and we like to look at handsome men (and the idea of handsome varies from woman to woman) and it’s a bonus if he is rich) and even we as female writers typically write our heroines as attractive and slim etc, because that is what people want to read and envision. We want to lose ourselves in a romance movie or book-that’s the point.

I remember years ago reading the Archie comics (who remembers those?) and one of the characters said. If love is blind why do so many men fall in love with beautiful women? Don’t know if that is verbatim, I read it many moons ago as a teenager. Of course it was a rhetorical question.

The reason I write is for a variety of reasons, and one reason is I get to write the men and women in my stories exactly how I want them (granted the women are not plain Jane’s) but they tend to have qualities about them that is “different” ie virtuous, not worldly etc.

If anyone can share more “Plain Jane” novels feel free to post them. I’m sure they’re out there.

~~Edit~~ Edward Rochester in Jane Eyre was rich, but not handsome, and in Bridget Jones diary, I believe 2 of the men pursuing her were rich.

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HEA, HFN and even shhh Christian erotica

Posted by Lmarbly on August 6, 2015 at 8:05 PM Comments comments (0)

HEA, HFN and even shhh Christian erotica


As the saying goes you learn something new every day. I went to an author’s site yesterday venting and seeking some information about various things that a writer would ask and should know. One poster told me of HEA (happily ever after) and HFN (happy for now) In her case she told me she tends to lean towards writing erotica and she looked at my book page and made some suggestions I hadn’t thought about. My Destinee romance novella story is wholesome for the most part, but had enough “ tension” between her and Edward that you knew a sexual under current was there without having her go there (because it was her desire to wait till marriage) However, my sequel I took it a bit further and added some heat (You know what I mean). Well for some readers who may not want sex in a clean novel, I was a bit flustered because, while I want to write about a virtuous woman or women, I also wanted to write about a virtuous woman once she gets married and have her in positions to do what a married woman would do. Positions? You see that ;) A little play on words, but you catch my drift.

Well another poster wrote me a few minutes ago and told me about Christian erotica. Huh? Never heard of it in my life, nor ever thought to even look such a thing up (not that I am against erotica, I’ve read a few in my day. I did look up CE and it made me happy to know that I could write my stories how I see fit-as long as I labeled them appropriately for women looking for specifics-though I probably still won’t go into graphic detail because I have too many people who know me personally who read my books, would be too awkward. I didn’t know writing would be such a complicated journey, but it is a fun journey, I’ve learned so much in the past 7 months since going live with my first novella.

I told a font on a website I like to visit, when the topic of sex came up (which is ALL the time) that God created sex and hello, Christian people like sex too. I’m still in the process of finding my niche audience. I want to keep my female characters as virtuous as possible, even though it is seemingly unrealistic in today’s world, but when they marry I want all inhibitions cast aside and I want to be able to write the joys of marital sex and let people know it is and can be a wonderful thing. I think people think the opposite when it comes to marriage and sex and Christians and sex.

If you are a christian what are your thoughts on christian erotica?



Posted by Lmarbly on August 1, 2015 at 10:05 PM Comments comments (0)



Jewel Davis is the sole owner and president of En-Naptured hair care products. She founded the company a few years back because she saw a real need for hair care products for African American women who wanted to go natural and maintain healthy luscious locks. She sensed there was urgency for black women to reclaim their God given unique beauty and let go of decade’s old ideas of European standards of beauty. She had the savvy and knew how to do it. She knew she had a fabulous product that would sell and give black women what they wanted in regards to hair care. It was a long tedious journey she didn’t get the support she felt she needed and deserved from longtime friends; but then she had to realize it was her dream and because she had to fight by herself to achieve it, she didn’t have to share the spotlight with anyone else. It took her ten good years before her dream was eventually realized. She is single, with no children and is the baby of the family with two sisters Amethyst and Garnet.

Their mother loved gem stones and always referred to her daughters as her little gems. Their parents stressed education and failure not being an option if they wanted to succeed in life. Each sister is successful, married to equally successful men. Her sister Amethyst is a nurse and her sister Garnet is a doctor, who briefly gave up her career to rear her now grown daughters and son. Jewel completed her Bachelor’s degree while working in retail. After graduation it took a few months of sending out resumes before she landed two interviews for two major corporations. She was offered both jobs within days of each other, but picked the one that was closest to her eventual goal, unknown to her at the time. She didn’t know what business venture she would strive for. It was her plan to work for a major company building her bank account and go from there.

She is one of four black women who work at KMA Corporation. Because it was only a few of them, they hit it off instantly. There was moral support in numbers. The company is a multi-million dollar cosmetics company. She didn’t know it at the time that it would be her ticket out of the rat race. She was observing how things were done in a major corporation, so when her time came she would already be ahead of the game. 

Read sample chapter here

My motivation for writing Destinee

Posted by Lmarbly on July 22, 2015 at 11:55 AM Comments comments (0)

My motivation for writing Destinee Romance Novella

By Lisa Marbly-Warir



My motivation for writing Destinee Romance novella; I’ve touched on this before in other articles. There is a local Christian store in my area that has a few copies of my book and one of the owners of the store suggested I post a YouTube video talking about what motivated me to write Destinee. (I have some YT videos out, but not one that speaks to why I wrote the book) At the time I wrote Destinee , which was around 2001, I was a single Christian woman. Around that time the book No more sheets By Juanita Bynum was out. I remember reading it, and thinking it wasn’t for me. The reason being, I wasn’t sexually active (TMI)and I wondered where were the books for Christian women who hadn’t gone down the path where they didn’t need No more sheets?

And the idea came to mind, to write a story (not about myself) but a story that I and perhaps other young women in the same situation could relate to. I wanted to write a story about a young woman who was waiting for a husband before she gave that part of herself away and of course the challenges she faced because of her choice.

Most women back then and especially now, are not waiting and men certainly are not waiting. Which is fine for them; but it presents a challenge for a woman who solely has to wait on God for a husband. However, at the end of the day Destinee is a romance story, she’s still a red blooded woman who wants sex, but at what cost? Does she even give in to desire and temptation? Or does she wait until she walks down the aisle? It’s a fast read, most people telling me “I couldn’t put it down once I started reading” I was also prompted by some of my readers, to do a follow up a sequel, which I did. It’s called Two become one: A Destinee romance sequel. Both books are available on Amazon. E book and paperback.

I think it’s admirable for any woman in this day and age who can deny herself until a man who is worthy of her comes along. I also know it is hard. For a woman who wants to maintain virginity till marriage, who is celibate, who is abstaining waiting on God is crucial and probably your only means of support to get through this time. For women and men who are growing up in a good church the idea of waiting is probably easier because they have been taught since youth, and they are likely the ones who marry young anyway, so they aren’t faced with years of the choice to wait.


Edit~~ I want to note, I am aware of the recent mockeries made of abstinence (Bristol Palin) sexual purity (The Duggars) and maintaining virginity (Clay Aiken). My words aren’t meant for everyone, I realize that most people today are not waiting, and please understand that is fine if that is your choice. I also know that my words are and will be inspirational for women who want them to be.

I also have other books I that I am working on; hopefully due out by or before the end of the year. I will go more into detail in another article.

What your mama didn’t tell you-is a working title.

Edward- (I don’t have a title for his story yet)

Born out of lust-Anthony’s story- Is also part of my Destinee series.

JEWEL-Is not a part of Destinee.



Interview with Attorney Edward Johnson

Posted by Lmarbly on June 30, 2015 at 10:20 PM Comments comments (0)

Interview with Attorney Edward Johnson

With Christine Thomas

Christine’s Corner

The Rosedale Daily



CT-Hi, I’m here today with Attorney Edward Johnson. He is a very busy man and has graciously agreed to do this interview as a favor for his wife Destinee. She and I go way back, we went to college together. I went into journalism. She went into business administration. We’ve kept in touch over the years and it is an honor to interview her husband.

CT-How are you today, Mr. Johnson?


CT-Thank you for agreeing to do this

EJ-No problem

CT-What is your full name?

EJ-Edward James Johnson Jr.

CT-What type of law do you practice?

EJ-I’m a general practice lawyer

CT-Did you always want to be a lawyer?


CT-What would you tell any young man out here about how to be successful?

EJ-Stay in school, finish college, work hard, envision your life goals and work towards them

CT-What is your idea of perfect happiness?

EJ-Home life, wife and kids, having a job that I love

CT-Which living person do you most admire? And why?

EJ-My dad; many fathers are not in the home; he was always there, and I am thankful for that. He showed me what a man and father is supposed to be.

CT-What is your most marked characteristic?

EJ-I think it’s my voice, but most people tell me it’s my eyes

CT-What is your greatest regret?

EJ-Don’t know that I have any regrets per se. Maybe not giving Destinee that ring sooner

CT-What is your greatest fear?

EJ-Not being able to take care of my family

CT-What was the best thing that ever happened to you?

EJ-Marrying my wife

CT-What was it about her?

EJ-She had a subtle confidence about herself. She was sweet, but not a push over.

CT-Do you believe in God?


CT-What’s the first thing people think about you before they know you?

EJ-That I’m stern, maybe a little arrogant

CT-Are you arrogant?

>>He chuckles here<< Not at all

CT-What’s your most embarrassing moment?

EJ-I was about 18 and asked a girl I liked to go out with me, and she told me no in front of her friends.

CT-What do you wear to bed?

EJ-Ask Destinee

CT-But I’m asking you.

EJ-The way God intended. Buck naked

CT-What did you think when you first saw Destinee?

EJ-I thought she was quiet.

CT-You knew Destinee about 7 years before you two got together? What took so long?

EJ-Believe it or not, I was a little intimidated by her. She wasn’t too easy to read.

CT-It was nice talking to you. Thank you for your time.

EJ-You’re welcome.

Destinee romance novella (Book 1)

Two become one: A Destinee Romance sequel (Book 2)

Born Out of Lust (Book 3)-coming soon

Jewel novella



Quotes from Destinee Romance Novella

Posted by Lmarbly on June 29, 2015 at 1:05 AM Comments comments (0)

Hi everyone, sorry been a way for a little bit. Each day I try to come up with something new and exciting for people to read. I am happy to say that I am about 3 weeks away from the release of Two become One-A Destinee sequel, but in the time being, I thought some quotes from the first book would be fun.

Destinee romance novella has a HEA rating.

"I was dressed by the time I heard Brad’s car pulling up. “Hey, Babe.” He said “You look nice” and he planted a big kiss on my lips. I liked him, but the kiss didn’t send tingles down my spine, the way I would have liked, and I felt guilty every time I went out with him knowing my heart belonged to another....."


“Seems both sexes say they want something real, but so many out here want to play mind games too.”


"I knew I was weird, and he called me out for the entire world to see. I wish I was different, like other women, who could throw caution to the wind and date without the thought of consequences."


It's like Fifty shades of Grey

Posted by Lmarbly on June 11, 2015 at 3:45 PM Comments comments (0)

Destinee Romance novella “It’s like a clean version of 50 shades of Grey.” I’ve had at least 2 readers tell me that. I don’t know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Perhaps a good thing because FSOG has sold very well and has become a household name. It was always my intention to read FSOG and I probably will, but I’ve been so busy with work and writing my own stories, I don’t have the leisure time anymore to read like I used to. Back in the day (early/mid 80’s into the early 90’s) I was a 2 novel a week junkie, reading was my life; this of course was before the days of the internet and cable TV as we know it.

When I first wrote Destinee some 15 years ago, it was originally geared towards Christian young women (hence the reason it is “clean”), but truthfully as I have mentioned before, any woman who is a romantic at heart will likely love the story of Destinee and Edward. He’s rich and handsome, and she is shy and unsure of herself when it comes to him; but it is a sweet story about how they work at coming together in spite of their differences. The story is told without sex getting in the way of them discovering each other. And don’t we all love sexual tension in stories?

Now please don’t get me wrong in regards to a good romance novel with gratuitous sex, because when I was an avid reader, I wanted the juicier the better. I wanted to read about the hero taking the heroine and having his way with her, with her consent of course and what red blooded woman doesn’t want to read about that? Deep down inside I think most women, likes a take charge alpha male especially a man who is rich and powerful, you add good looks to that and he only has eyes for you, that is orgasmic on its own. Based on what I know about FSOG, a rich and powerful man and a woman who is completely under his spell is the only similarity that I am aware of.


Destinee name origin

Posted by Lmarbly on April 25, 2015 at 5:40 PM Comments comments (0)

When I first wrote Destinee I hadn't really thought of the origin of the name, I just thought it was a cute name back then, but thinking about it years later- the storyline and the direction of her life and events really does tie into the word destiny.

Courtesy of Google

noun: destiny; plural noun: destinies

the events that will necessarily happen to a particular person or thing in the future.

"she was unable to control her own destiny"


the hidden power believed to control what will happen in the future; fate.

"he believes in destiny"



Courtesy of


Meaning and name origin

Destinee \d(e)-sti-nee, des-tinee\ as a girl's name is of Old French origin, and the meaning of Destinee is "one's certain fortune, fate". Destinee is a variant of Destiny (Old French); mythology: the Greek deity of fate.

Is Destinee about me?

Posted by Lmarbly on April 20, 2015 at 12:00 AM Comments comments (0)

I've had a few people ask me if Destinee is about me. Let me just set the record straight. This book is not about me. One person even asked, was it about my husband and myself -to which I replied, I wrote Destinee 15 years ago, I met my husband 8 years ago, so um, no it's not about me, or me and him. Sorry. :)

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About the Author

Lisa Marbly-Warir is an avid reader and has been writing for years. She started out writing fan fiction of celebrities and TV/movie characters. Michael Jackson was her favorite to write about and it garnered her a small following. She published her first book Destinee romance novella (completed 2001) January 2015. Painting and drawing is also a favorite pastime though she doesn’t do it as often as she used to. Next to reading, writing and drawing, Lisa also loves to travel. She has been to Europe, the Caribbean and North Africa as well as travels throughout the United States. You will see she incorporates some of her travel journeys into her stories. One of her quotes “Writing is an escape, and I love living through my characters and bringing them to life”


Cat person-(she loves dogs too)

Red (favorite color)

Rose (favorite flower)

Jane Eyre (favorite novel)



My Tumblr page